Marriage- best and hardest thing in my life

We've been married for 4 1/2 years. Cra-zy. First couple of years were tough. Not like "Why don't you replace the toilet paper" tough but like "Holy moly how is this going to work?" tough. And we knew what we were getting into too- dating for seven years you got a pretty good idea of what you are in for. But then there's the other part. Getting married at 22. What do twenty two years old know? A whole lot of nothing important- that's what. I knew that Andy was a cute boy that would make me laugh a lot and take care of me. That's it. Good starting place but man oh man if I could go back and talk to 22 year me I think I would say something like "You better get over yourself real quick cause you are about to figure out the world isn't all about you and being someone's wife, or at least doing it well, requires you to continually be loving and gracious in times when you aren't feeling particularly loving or gracious. So what I am getting at here is that over this past four years there has been a lot of growing up. A lot of forced maturation for the sake of not ending up some divorce statistic and CHOOSING to love each other. I blab on this blog all the time about what an amazing man I am married to (and the stories I tell about him are just the tip of the iceberg as far as him awesomeness goes) but I wanted to write this to say that sometimes I have to choose to love Andy and most certainly there are times when he has to choose to love me. Part if this process has been full acceptance of who we are married to. I can be emotionally needy, hard-headed home body who has some pretty regular selfish moments. I am most definitely a work in progress and will continued to be for the rest of my life.
So this rant is coming from a picture we took a few weeks ago I just stumbled upon and struck me. On this night I was going to a Christmas party and Andy worked in the garage all night on his car. We both had awesome nights. I think it just made me realized that even a year ago I would of dragged him to that party because I want him to enjoy going out and getting dressed up as much as I do, well he doesn't. Not at all. Just like I don't enjoy going to test drive cars for a date night (true story). Last night I went to a different party without him and had a wonderful time because I was able to sit and just be with friends all evening and know that he has as happy as a clam at home in the garage. What peace has come to our marriage when we embraced the other one and stopped trying to help them become the person we think they should become. I have some wise friends and family members so I know this is all old news to you, well really good for you guys, but I'm a little slow to figuring out this whole marriage thing so you'll have to forgive me. I have a long ways to go for sure, but having that foundation of "you're my partner no matter what so be your little happy self" sure goes a long ways. The good news we have all the major things in agreement (spirituality, finances, future goals, values) but anything else you couldn't find two more opposite people. And boy does that make life interesting...