Update on Hank the Tank

What a journey. Seriously. You guys know....this kid... Whew! A beautiful, strong, increadibly smart handful that we love. He has challenged us in everyway possible. From birth to right this very moment (someone doesn't want to take a nap right now) he has been crying. Crying for something we didn't know. We've brainstormed every possibility. We've prayed. We've cried, oh how we've cried. We've yelled more than we should. We have felt heart broken that our baby boy is so unhappy. 

Our struggle is so tiny compared to what some parents go through, so I barely got a taste of this, but I believe that there is no worse feeling on this earth than not being able to help your child. I remember one night when he was itty bitty I was resolute that this would be the night we would be able to rock him to sleep and not lay this hysterical child down in his crib for him to scream by himself for an hour. Well, we rocked that baby for eight hours of him crying on and off. For eighteen months we've wanted to hold him and rock him to sleep but most the time he won't let us. So there was more crying. 

Then we would complain to all of you guys and feel like you thought we were making it up. As much as he was a screaming, crying mess at home, he was social, active, smiling kid with other people around. I'm sure you all believed us but when you see a really happy kid and then the parents are telling you that he cries 2-3 hours a day, the stories don't quite add up. Thanks for supporting us even though the little toot never acted up in front of most of you.

Okay, so let's get to the news. We finally have some answers. The back story to how both of these things came to be is very cool and clearly has God's hand in it. That's for another long winded email though...

First thing that happened is through friends we suspected he may have some sensory issues. We took him to an occupational therapist who has been doing this for 25+ years. I was a little dubious of the whole thing but when she started describing specific behaviors these kind of kids may exhibit and it was like she was describing Hank to a T, well, I was sold.There were a lot of examples but I will try to list a few- banging his head into pillows/couch cushions, crawling into small spaces, not liking light, gentle touch, not liking swinging, having a hard time with transitions. So, we got the diagnosis of sensory processing disorder, specifcaly with a vestibular and tactile sensitivity. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around it but the short version is he feels the world very differently than we do. It sounds so weird but I was so happy with the diagnosis. I've had 18 months of knowing in my heart there was something off but just being told over and over by the pediatrician that he is just a high needs kid. She gave us lots of exercises to do at home to help him and hopefully we will be able to go back semi regularly for more therapy.

Okay, the second thing that happened is a big one. This was another thing that has made me feel like a complete crazy person. I KNEW he had food allergies. He had just terrible eczema from the time he was only a few months old. I've researched it like crazy and tracking what this kid has eaten has been my obsession the last year or so. The pediatrician did a blood test for allergies at 6 months- nothing came up. Then he tried again at 15 months- only walnuts came up positive which we already knew (scary experience!). We took him to a very experienced pediatric dermatologist who assured us that there was no connection between wheat and eczema. I felt neurotic but I cut wheat out of his diet and low and behold his face cleared up. Randomly though, once every week or two his face and neck would break out really badly. I suspected corn and tomatoes. So a friend of mine was having some issues with her son and got him allergy tested and found out he had a multitude. She encouraged me to try as well and we did that today. So here's are the food sensitivites we are dealing with:

Grains (long list including wheat)

Corn

Eggs

Sugar

Nuts

Tomatoes

Nighshades (eggplant, tomatoes, bell peppers, all chili peppers including jalapenos, habaneros, all chili spice mixes, paprika, pimentos, tomatillos, etc)

Glutamates

Salicylates

Amines

Those bottom three I haven't had a much time to research but my understanding is that it's a chemical in a lot of things, including fruit. The good news is that these things are treatable. The really good news is that I'm not crazy. I had just about decided I was making this whole thing up and give the kid a piece of bread. Just goes to show that mother's intuition is real. 

If you are still reading you must really love us because this is getting way long. We are just feeling very hopeful that between finding these two things out in just a few days time we have really gotten some prayers answered. Just knowing how to deal with Hank better and having more empathy for what he going through is going to change everything. Our confidence as parents has really gone down, we haven't been particularly joyful, it's just been really hard. Dealing with SPD and all these food sensitivites isn't going to be easy but compared to having a miserable kid, well we feel pretty blessed to know what we know and when you know better you do better (hopefully!).

Love you all. Thank you to our friends that came and rocked Hank late at night when I just couldn't anymore, brought us meals, and helped us so much. Thank you for still putting up with us even though we were emotionally bankrupt and pretty zombie-like. Thanks to our family for loving and praying for us from afar. It truly does take a village and we've got a good one. Hugs and kisses to you all!

Playing a *little* catch up.....

HI! It's been awhile! Missed you! I initially blamed it on blogger not letting me upload any more pictures, but I think we fixed that problem and have just been busy. And by busy I mean barely keeping to together for awhile now. Since it's been couple years since I regularly blogged and can't even begin to update everything that's happen I will let the pictures explain it all

We were OVERJOYED to find out our family was growing

Then November 5, 2013 Hank joined in on the fun

He did a WHOLE LOT of this for pretty much the first year

Now he's slowly begining to realize that sleep isn't the worse thing ever and we are enjoying the little booger

Somewhere in the midst of the craziness, Ruby turned into a three year old

And here we are, figuring out life with two kids that love to run in opposite directions, have strong opinions, and above all make life such an adventure

does this work?

no me gusta blogspot

so apparently it's not a great idea to upload directly from your big fancy camera and not shrink photo sizes first. because if you do this then you blog becomes "full" and you can't blog anymore.

whomp whomp whomp.

didn't want to leave you all hanging, so that's what's up. it's a bummer too because i've got all sorts of stuff to bore entertain you with.....

Halloween 2012

We had a lot of fun Halloween events this year, so I'm going to throw them all in one post and just warn you this is very picture heavy. But cute picture heavy....at least I think so!

The first Haloween-y thing we did was go to pumpkin carving party a couple threw from our church. They have an awesome backyard and it was set up with tables for us to eat dinner and then carve away. Ruby did wonderful even thoguh it was waaay past her bedtime.

The Luksys. They sit where others stand.

They had glow bracelets...Ruby was in love.

Thought the pumpkin gunk would be a fun sensory experience. She wasn't having any part of it.

Somehow this didn't win her over either....


Baby girl's first Halloween costume! She even left the hat on, which was a miracle, I think she knew how cute it was :)

Our little strawberry!



A couple from church threw a baby Halloween party. Basically a chance for us to get the babes together and oh and ah over their incredible collective cuteness.

 

Seven babies under 2 years old- craziness!

Okay, fast forward to actual Halloween day. While we were waiting on Andy to get home from work and get our fun night started we took a few pics in the yard....

Had to take a few pumpkin pics of course!

Snuggling with frankenstein

After we gobbled down a quick dinner, we headed out to visit our friends. A lot of our friends live in the neighborhood about a mile from us and Ruby still does pretty awful in the car so we decided to bike. It made it even more fun!

Right before we headed out to trick or treat

A few of the friends we visited.....

ps. i know my captions and spacing is all wonky. i cannot figure out blogger these days and have kind of just given up....anyone who knows how to fix any of this please msg/email me b/c I definitely don't have the time or energy to switch to another publisher.....

It's crazy what can happen.....

in one year!

the infamous pumpkin picture

much happier pumpkin-free!

a normal day

Okay, I meant to do this when she was a newborn, then again at 6 months, but I kept forgetting. I want to have this to look back on and remember how simple and fun life was a one year old. So, finally a couple weeks ago I just committed to taking a bunch of pictures and documenting our day day. Here it is....


MORNING

7am- Andy is already up and I wake up to Ruby babbling in her crib. I love just watching her on the monitor play and talk but this morning I get up so we can get the day started like we always do...just waking up slowly together snuggling in the rocker.

I get Ruby snuggles....

Andy gets to cook breakfast, doesn't seem fair does it? I think we still do this because morning time was Ruby's longest nursing time and I miss that

 Then we head out for a morning walk, we don't get to do this everyday, but try to at least a couple times a week. It's nice to have some time to just talk with Andy before we go our separate ways.

After about a mile Andy heads to work and we wave bye bye to him. Ruby still waves towards herself, it's so cute.

8am-Once we get home it's breakfast time for Ruby. She gets milk, cheerios, eggs, and pears.



Then we play on the floor for awhile, currently she is loving the plastic container our pasta was in last night and she practices putting coasters in it. Only the best for our kid ;)


9am- Nap time! She goes right down after a little bit of rocking. Then I get to shower and have big plans to be productive but end up watching an episode of "How I Met Your Mother" instead and writing a few emails to friends. She wakes up after only an hour.

10am- Since we have  a few hours before lunch time and we didn't leave the house yesterday I decide we definitely need a little outing. So I try to find some pants that will fit her since it's cooling down a little but with no luck. So, I put her in some leg warmers and she looks a little crazy but eh, if there's ever time you can pull off zebra shoes, rainbow striped leg warmers, and a polka dotted skirts, it's when you are a one year old so we just go with it.

We go walk around the Halloween store and Old Navy. I return a pair of colored skinny jeans that I ultimately decided I'm  not cool enough for. The sales lady tells me I am skinny, then I kiss her on the lips...okay, not really, but almost...
 

Ruby's first Halloween costume, which I later decide I don't like and return for (what I think) is a much cuter one

12pm- Lunch Time! Ruby and I both eat leftover spaghetti.  She also gets some oranges and broccoli. She throws every last bit of the broccoli on the floor.

1pm- Cleaned up from lunch (she is a very slow eater) we have some time before nap so I just lay on the floor and she hands me things and I get excited about it and she laughs. Fun times.

2pm- NAP TIME! Ruby goes down and I search craigslist for a jogging stroller, then try to clean up a little but. There may or may not have been a teeny bit of facebook snuck in there too ;)

3pm- The last hour or so before Andy gets home is always the longest, I think, especially on days like this, where it's just been the two of us all day, we need Andy to come home and "entertain" us. Today we hang out on the deck, I blow bubbles and she is not into them at all and just wants to hold Molly's disgusting, covered in mud and slobber. Germs help build the immune system right? Little girl's bound to have one kicking immune system with my "eh" approach to germs.

 4pm- Andy calls and says he got some good news at work today. I have dinner planned but it's nothing exciting so I decide I can kill two birds with one stone and we can celebrate Andy's success AND I don't have to cook dinner by going out. I pack Ruby up and tell Andy we are on our way to pick him up.

5pm- Sharing some chicken fajitas at Taco Cabana....yes, it's lame that we live in Austin, Texas, where there is arguable some of the best Mexican food restaurants around yet we eat at Taco Cabana. What can I say? It's cheap (we can eat for $10) and our loud baby doesn't get the stink eye she might get if we went to a nicer restaurant. It's amazing how our eating our options now factor in where we can get the least amount of stink eye. Tonight we splurged and ordered nachos too, yeah, the Luksys's know how to party ;) 

Then we return Ruby's costume to Old Navy and go walk around REI for a bit before heading home. With Ruby's early bedtime it makes most nights out feel a little rushed. But then, we also get some down time after she goes to bed too which is nice.

not from this particular night, but I forgot to take a picture and couldn't resist posting this preciousness

So, there it is. Nothing too exciting (or even exciting at all) but it's a pretty typical day. We have lots of fun, I can't imagine not being with her all day because she is just growing up so fast. Nearly everyday I have something new she's done to tell Andy that night (yesterday it was that she can point to things she wants now). The best and also most challenging part of my role as a stay at home mom is the simplicity of it all. I love that it's me and her all day and I know what to do to make her happy. However every day is basically eat, play, sleep, play, eat, play, sleep, play, eat, play. It can be monotonous at time, but is getting so much better with her becoming more social and having some friends close that stay home as well. We are also in weekly mom group and Bible study that takes up a big chunk of two days a week. Those breaks are good for both of us from each other.

Before I stayed home I knew it wasn't meant for everyone, but I now believe it is a true calling. That whole "best and hardest" job you'll ever have thing is so true for me. We are really enjoying life right now with our sweet baby girl.

I am going to try to do this every six months or so, but if my track record is any indication it may be a little longer before our next "normal day" update.